Why Great Salespeople (or anyone) Shouldn’t Try to Fix Everything

Yesterday, I was having one of those days.

Not dramatic. Not dire. Just a bit… mentally heavy.

At Sandler, we call it head trash—that internal noise that clouds your focus, confidence, or self-talk. I wasn’t doubting my career. I wasn’t quitting. I just needed to offload the clutter and reset.

So, I reached out to a friend. Someone I trust. I started to share what I was feeling with them… and the more I shared, the more frustrated I felt. I wasn’t getting what I needed. I wasn’t really being heard. Eventually, I gave up, shut down, and changed the subject.

Later, I sat with it. Two important sales (and life) lessons struck me. Read this and tell me if you ever felt this way…

1. 🚫 People don’t need to be fixed. They need to be heard.

In sales, we’re trained to be solution-oriented. Identify the problem. Propose the fix. Move things forward. Even when we were kids, at school, we were always requested to give answers, and those who were able to were rewarded. It is in our nature.

But here’s the thing: not every moment is a fixing moment or "give me the answer" moment.

Sometimes, your prospect—or your teammate, manager, friend, or YOU—just needs to talk it out. Not to be redirected, reframed, or advised. Just heard.

When someone opens up and we jump in with:

“You shouldn’t feel that way.”

“Here’s what I’d do,”

It shuts them down. The real message becomes:

“Your emotion is inconvenient. Let’s wrap this up.”

Instead, how about trying this:

1) Cushion the emotion to show understanding without judgment:

“I can understand why you’d feel that way.”

“That makes total sense, given the situation.”

2) Then paraphrase what you heard to confirm you got it:

“Sounds like you’re feeling overwhelmed with everything hitting at once.”

“So you were expecting a different outcome after all that effort—am I hearing that right?”

These two simple tools do more than comfort. They build trust—and trust moves deals forward.

2. 💬 Saying it out loud often solves it. This may be what they need. Period.

Ever notice how just talking it out gives you clarity?

The solution was always there. It just needed air.

The same goes for your clients, friends, and employees. People don’t argue with their own data (and feelings).

When we let them speak freely—without rushing to pitch—we give them the space to uncover their own conclusions. That’s when real trust forms, and sometimes it is the only thing they are looking for at the moment.

That’s also when objections often disappear on their own.

And for ourselves?

Some of my best breakthroughs didn’t come from advice.

They came from someone simply holding space.

Final Thought

If you’re in sales, remember:

Listening isn’t just prep for your pitch. It’s the moment you earn the right to speak.

So the next time someone—prospect, colleague, or friend—shares their “head trash,” try this:

Don’t fix it.
Don’t fast-forward it.
Cushion. Paraphrase. And just BE there.

Because in sales—and life—being heard often matters more than being helped.