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This is the Building Blocks of Success with Glenn Mattson.
Glenn Mattson:
Hey everybody, Building Blocks of Success. Welcome back. Season 7, Episode 4. You know, we've been talking for a handful of sessions about the stretch zone and the comfort zone and how the allure of the comfort zone will want you to be normal, to want you to stay where you are. And anytime that you try to get into your stretch zone, part of your body and your brain will tell you to go back to the way it used to be. And that's really the part of the issue I want to make sure you all get is as you start to try to become better, as you start to grow. When you're getting into areas that your body doesn't want you to grow on, it'll try to convince you to stay the way you are. So it'll say things like, why are you doing this? Are you sure about this? No one else is doing it. And what it’s really trying to do is keep you where you are. Now realize when you have those things pop in your head, that's an indication you're doing awesome because your brain wouldn't be saying that stuff if you were in a comfort zone.
Today, and last session that we did in episode three, we were jumping into the growth curve. And the growth curve, again, is the four stages that you go through when you get into the stretch zone. So anytime you find yourself getting a little uncomfortable, having anxiety, having a little nervousness about where you are and what you’re doing, that means that you're getting outside your comfort zone and you're going into your stretch zone. So with that being said, when that occurs, I want to give you the tools to be prepared to not only survive the initial impact of your stretch zone, but stay there longer so you can actually get to where you want to go.
So the growth curve is something that we've created over here at MEI for, my gosh, 30 years. And that's one of the reasons we get such insane results that we do with our clients is on the anticipation that they're going to have to do something that's going to make them uncomfortable. We spend some time on making sure that you will stay the course.
So whenever you try something different, the very first phase you're going to go through isuncomfortability, which is, I don't know why I'm doing this. This feels uncomfortable. I'm kind of embarrassed. We talked about how to get ready and get prepared for that phase. Today, we're going to be talking about, well, you jumped in the pool. Now you're in the cold part. And I've never, ever done a cold plunge before, but my gosh, it just sucks all the air right out of your body in a second. It's like, oh, man, it is cold stuff. So think of the exact same thing that's going to happen when you jump into a stretch zone.
So the resistance, which is step two, is going to happen. Your body is going to scream. Everything is going to scream. What are you doing? Why are you doing this? So I want to share with you four things that I have found to be exceedingly successful when it comes to helping you break the resistance barrier when it's into your stretch zone.
Glenn Mattson:
So I just want to make sure we're all on the same page when it's about to do something that you don't want to do. Whatever it is, you're going to be uncomfortable to begin with. But once you start it, once you're in the deep end, once you start making those phone calls, when you start playing your feet, when you start using the pain funnel, whatever it is to get outside your comfort zone, there's going to be resistance. And let me share with you four things that I have found that are exceedingly successful when it comes to breaking the resistance barrier.
Now remember, resistance is why you're doing it. The uncomfortability part is before you get started. And that's why the why is important in understanding your fear. Now we're in the ring. The boxing match is on and we're walking in and we just got punched. So now we are in the resistance phase. So let me walk you through the ones that I have found to be incredibly powerful, that are really, really successful to get you ready that while you're in that phase of growth, things to remember.
The first. Yeah, you're going to say, yep, that kind of makes sense to me. First is your perception of failure. You have to put yourself in reality. You are going to be trying something that is new or trying something that you don't have ownership on. That means you need to practice it. That means with practice, you're going to have successes. And with practice, you're going to have lessons. Some of you would say failures. If you look at failure and say, I'm a loser. If you look at failure and say, I'm a ding dong. If you look at failure and say, that's embarrassing. If you look at failure and want to run from it, what do you think the likelihood of you putting yourself in a position to take risks is going to happen? It's very low, team. Very low. So when we look at the possibility of potential failure and you see failure as a negative, you ain't going to fail a lot. So therefore, you're not going to risk a lot. So I want you to look at failure a little differently if you could.
Now, look, I grew up in a household. I had three brothers. We all played sports. I would wake up on a Saturday. Sunday morning, maybe Saturday afternoon if it was the spring. But Saturday, for us in the springtime, I was lacrosse. The fall is football. So football was Saturday mornings. So Sunday morning, if I didn't win the game or if we didn't win the game, I'm not going to say it happened a lot, but it would not be unusual for somehow, some way, one of my brothers would get it in there between, you know, The time I went to bed and the time I woke up, I still don't know how they did it. But they would actually put an L on my forehead with a Sharpie. So sure enough, you wake up in the morning time. You go down for breakfast. You got the moppy hair going on. You haven't showered yet. You're walking down there and everyone's kind of chuckling. And it takes you a couple minutes to figure it out when you're brushing your teeth that you have a big L on your forehead, which, by the way, is really hard to get off. And they all think it's funny. Loser. If we take that badge and we walk around an office right now feeling like we're walking around with the Sharpie put in our head because we tried something that didn't work. We feel like a failure. We feel like a loser. That's our problem right there.
Glenn Mattson:
So I'm wanting to start thinking about things a little differently, if you may. Failure is nothing more than an outcome that is something we weren't hoping for. All failure is, is getting an outcome that is not what we were hoping for. As a matter of fact, it's what we didn't want, but that's what we got. So failure is nothing more than data. Failure is the outcome because you did something or you didn't do something, period. So to me, failure is a lesson. Failure is going to give you feedback on what went well and what didn't go well. See, if we have failure as a negative and we spend all our time defending ourselves so we don’t look like we're a failure, how are we ever supposed to learn from failure? How are we?
This is a gentleman that, a client of mine for about eight or nine years, he's a producer over atan international national company. And I remember Scott, his name is Scott Sparks, he came to a boot camp. And every time I asked who wants to role play, he would raise his hand. Most of the times when I say, who wants to role play in front, he'd stand up and start walking towards the front. Not that he was arrogant or rude by any means. He's probably the most humble guy I've ever met. But his mindset is, is that if you all don't want to practice, I'll practice. And when we were done with the three-day symposium, I asked, what did you learn? And a woman up front said that she learned that she wants to be more like him. And I said, I don't understand because I am terrified of getting up in front of people and practicing. I am absolutely terrified. And I love the stuff, but I'd rather just go practice it on prospects. But he's okay practicing it all the time.
And Scott's viewpoint was, well, if I don't practice it here, I'm not supposed to be good at it. I just learned it an hour ago. The last thing I want to do is practice in front of someone where there's money on the table. So why wouldn't I want to get all the kinks out of the armor? And practice everything in a safe environment? So regardless if you're in the business for a year or two, or if you're in the business for 30 years, failure teaches you how to be successful faster.
Failure is what gives us feedback. So why would you look away from criticism? Why would you think criticism is negative? Why would you be defensive when someone's giving you advice? So one of the things I'd have you take a peek at as an individual, and remember this, I’ve said this to you probably a thousand times, but it's important to remember to jot down somewhere. So pull over your car and jot it down. Failure at versus a failure because. A failure at versus a failure because.
Glenn Mattson:
See, if you make a phone call and you think you're a failure because you didn't do good on the phone, shame, shame. That means you're taking failure personally. I'm a failure because I couldn't pick up the telephone. I'm a failure because I couldn't call that person. I'm a failure because after getting two no's, I wimped out for the rest of the day versus saying you're a failure at. See, being a failure because means that you failed as a person versus saying I failed at means you failed in the role. I failed at getting a good upfront contract. I failed at finding pain.
You're not a failure because you couldn't find pain. Very different. You think I'm going to go on to the driving range or the golf course and say I'm a failure because I can't use a nine iron? Or is it just because I failed at using my nine iron? So one of the biggest things I would tell you, lots of companies, teams, for sure producers who will always reach out to us is to try to overcome that mindset of failure.
Failure is just immobilizing to them. It just stops them in the track. It is very scary for a lot of people. So if you're one of those people, feel free to reach out, but you have to start changing the way you perceive failure. It's just rewriting your scripts in your head and what it means.
Many of us grew up in a household where failure was negative. So therefore, we see it as negative. Remember, my son was on the phone and we were with an RIA, which is an individual that has a bunch of financial planners below them, registered investment advisors. And this individual has 147 offices. As we're talking through a product that we have called the Sandler AI Coach, which is just an amazing. Absolutely amazing tool for role plays and building confidence and courage where you can do thousands and thousands of dry runs that are just real time. It's just, it's an amazing tool.
But when we look at this, the individual, his name is David, was talking with Sean and David asked him four questions and Sean asked those, answered those four questions. And then David turned around and said, all right, let's do it. And the important thing that I heard was David asked four qualification questions to Sean. After Sean answered them, he made a decision. He made a decision to move forward. And I said, David, do you mind if we take a moment? Because I want Sean to hear this. I want all of you to hear this too. Decision makers get others to make decisions. If you're a salesperson and you can't make decisions, you're going to be prone to get an awful lot of people who can't make decisions. No decision is worse than the wrong decision. People don't make a decision because they're afraid of failure. Because of that, this is the reason I'm telling you the story.
Glenn Mattson:
So David, exceedingly successful, a lot of offices, locations, has a beautiful jet, boats, the whole thing. David does very well for himself and very well earned. But what he said to Sean was, he goes, I asked you four things that gave me the framework of this is the right decision. And I answered it, yes, do it. Because Sean, if I made the wrong decision, all that means is I have to make another one tomorrow. The worst thing I can do is not make a decision. And David went on for about three minutes sharing with Sean how decision-making is one of the most important pieces in being an owner. And if you're afraid of making the wrong decision, you're never going to be a good owner because no one makes all the right decisions. The only way you know how to make the right decision is by learning when you make the wrong decisions. So don't be afraid of failure. Next one I want to share with you is called micro successes. So micro successes is, man, what a great concept this is.
So this is for each individual or anyone who has a team reporting to them. So micro successes, just think about it as a building blocks or a staircase. I also want you to think about the old saying is, is that you can't eat an elephant in one bite, right? Everything has to be broken down to bite-sized pieces. When we look at micro successes, micro successes is really about how do we take this big objective and break it into small pieces? So for instance, take me for a moment. When I first got started in the business, as you guys well have known, right? Or have heard me talk about, I had massive, massive anxiety, massive weaknesses, massive head trash. It's the reason I spend so much time on this stuff is I know a lot of people have it and I know you can fix it. I used to actually vomit in garbage cans before I had a prospect.
So instead of making me ultra comfortable in all these scenarios, Mark, my original mentor, guy who I first started working with before. His rule with me the very first year was something very simple. Go for the no. So if I needed eight people to tell me no to get one yes, but I wanted three yeses for the month, Mark would say, Glenn, go get me 24 people, 24 people over the next four weeks that tell you no. No, I don't want to buy it. No, I don't want to use your training. No, I don't want to grow. No, I don't think you're worth it. No, no, no. Do you realize that it is easier to get a no than a yes? Do you realize that you actually ask four times more questions going for the no than going for the yes? Do you realize that most of the junk that you get at the end of a meeting when you go for the yes, you don't get when you go for the no? You get truth faster.
Glenn Mattson:
So without realizing it, Mark taught me how to go for the no. I would come back from a meeting feeling bad, feeling embarrassed. How'd it go? How'd it end? I said, ah, we didn't get him. He’d jump up from his desk, run over and give me a big hug. It was just as good as getting a yes because a no was cashing the check tomorrow and a yes is cashing the check today. You get to think it over, there is no cash check. So the more no's I got, the more lessons I got. The more lessons I got, the less no's I got. So not being afraid of the no was a masterful way of getting me to overcome my fear of rejection.
Successors. Micro successors. How about I had someone who was for 90 days, had a manager literally that would have like a fisticuff every Friday about what the numbers were supposed to be, what the numbers were, and what the numbers need to be next time. This person was supposed to be seeing 10 people a week, eight to 10, excuse me. They were seeing between three and four. And 80% of the one-on-ones with the manager was just a battle back and forth. You know you need to do this. This is how you do it. And it really wasn’t accomplishing anything.
So Nancy is her name. And I said to Nancy, at three and four, I said, what's the real number that if you had a stretch, I mean, stretch, you can get to, that you're willing to fight for? She said, I can do four a week. You got it. She did four that week. She did four the next week. Third week, I said, Nancy, strange question. Yeah, you're doing four pretty consistently now. Feeling good about it? She goes, yep. I said, you feel like you're maxed out, right? I did a little negative reverse. I went to the other extreme. You feel like you're maxed out? She goes, no, no, not at all. I think I can actually do a little more. I said, get out of here. Little doubt. She said, no, I think I can. I think I can do maybe five or even six.
I said, Nancy, let's not get ahead of ourselves. What's the number that you're willing to commit to? She said, I think I can do six. I said, Nancy, do me a favor and take out the word, I think. What's the word? I will. What's the number? She goes, six. I said, Nancy, that's a big jump. You sure about that? You don't know what that move is. You better listen to my other podcasts, right? That's coaching one-on-one. She turned around and she doubled down. She was absolutely, I can do six. Following week, she did six. Week after that, she did six. Week after that, she did seven. Now we're in it for five weeks right now. We've gone from four now to seven in four weeks. The manager has been managing her for 12 weeks and gotten zero growth.
Then I turned to her and say, okay, we're doing seven. Where do you think? is the next spot for you to be at. And she's the one that went from seven to eight to ten to twelve, more than she's supposed to be doing. That took two months to do versus 90 days of the leader beating her up on one-on-ones and telling her what she should do, could do, and why she isn’t doing it.
Glenn Mattson:
Micro successes are amazing because you get someone to buy into some important stuff psychologically. With a small bite-sized piece, when they hit success, they turn around and say, my God, I can do this. I can do this turns into, I will do this, to I am doing this. If she's doing four, she's the one who has to decide, well, hell, this ain't that hard. I can probably do five. Are you really going to commit to five? Yeah, I can commit to five. Then do five. So micro successes are micro baby steps to have someone grow.
I'm going to leave this last one for you, then I'll let you go for the podcast for today. Is that one of the greatest micro successors I have found in commissionable sales is the 10% rule. The 10% rule basically states this. We've been doing this for years, 30 some odd years. 10% rule at MEI states this: 10% growth of your average case size every 60 days.
If you do it every 60 days, you'll grow by 150%. If you can grow your average case size by 10% every 30 days, and what will happen over a course of a year, your average case will triple. You'll go from $300 to $900 doing nothing else besides increasing your average case size. So think about micro successes, everybody. It's an easier way to build confidence and courage when you're inside the resistance. Remember, the resistance is the phase when you first enter into the stretch zone.
Next time, we'll talk about a couple of the other solutions and some other tried and true. But remember. When you're first starting off, when you first get into that area, when you're trying something new, don't be afraid of failure. Look towards it. Look around. Ask people on what you can be doing better, different, more of, to make sure that you are not feeling criticism, but you're looking for areas for improvement. Stay focused on your micro successes. Baby steps will create confidence. Confidence will create courage.
I look forward to talking to you next as we break down other tried and true techniques that you can do to break down resistance and what happens with adaptation. I look forward to our next session on the Building Blocks of Success.
This is the Building Blocks of Success with Glenn Mattson.
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