“A reputation can take a lifetime to build, but seconds to destroy.” Rapport can feel just as fragile. One awkward joke or careless comment can shift a positive conversation in the wrong direction.
Recognizing when someone feels comfortable, heard, and respected, and when they don’t, is the first step toward building strong rapport. The OK Principle offers a simple way to understand these moments.
What Does “Okay” Feel Like?
Feeling okay can mean feeling comfortable, confident, heard, or cared about. Feeling not okay can mean feeling angry, annoyed, frustrated, pressured, or ignored. In a sales conversation, even being ghosted can leave someone feeling not okay.
These feelings affect both sides of a conversation. A prospect may make a salesperson feel not okay, making it harder to stay composed. And salespeople can unintentionally make prospects feel that way, too.
A Little Empathy Can Change Your Response
We rarely know what someone else is dealing with. They may be having a difficult day, facing a personal challenge, or carrying worries we can’t see. Remembering that can help us respond with more patience.
For example, if someone cuts you off in traffic, it’s easy to react with frustration. But pausing to consider that they may be rushing to an important meeting or dealing with an emergency can change how you respond. That doesn’t excuse inconsiderate behavior. It simply leaves room for empathy.
The same idea applies to conversations with prospects, clients, and colleagues. When someone seems distracted, abrupt, or frustrated, try not to assume you know why. Stay curious and give them the chance to explain.
Small Actions Can Change the Conversation
Using unfamiliar company jargon, interrupting, talking down to someone, applying pressure, or rushing a conversation can leave a prospect feeling unheard or uncomfortable. Even a familiar buzzword can create confusion if you assume the other person understands it the same way you do.
The OK Principle applies beyond sales. It’s a life skill that helps us pay attention to how others may be feeling and adjust our approach with care.
How to Course-Correct
People generally want to feel okay. When a prospect starts feeling not okay, their instinct may be to end the conversation. Noticing that shift gives you a chance to respond thoughtfully and rebuild rapport.
You can help someone feel more okay by acknowledging their experience, helping them see they’re not alone, or reassuring them that what they’re experiencing isn’t unusual. Sometimes, meeting someone where they are means showing a little vulnerability yourself.
The goal isn’t to force a positive feeling or rush past discomfort. It’s to notice what’s happening, listen, and respond in a way that helps the other person feel understood. That awareness can make the difference between a conversation that goes off track and one where trust can grow.-
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Dave Fischer, Sandler NYC, provides sales training, sales management training, leadership development, and executive coaching to help organizations build stronger teams and grow revenue. Serving New York City and the surrounding area, Dave helps sales professionals, managers, business owners, and executives improve prospecting, qualification, communication, accountability, and pipeline management.
Sandler training also helps salespeople build rapport, create stronger connections, and help prospects feel comfortable, heard, and understood. By asking thoughtful questions, listening closely, and reducing pressure in sales conversations, teams can build trust and uncover what matters to each prospect.
If you’re looking for sales training in NYC, sales coaching, leadership development, prospecting training, or executive coaching, contact Dave Fischer to explore practical strategies for stronger sales conversations and more predictable results.
