Prospectophobia is the intense, irrational fear of reaching out to potential buyers one doesn’t yet happen to know personally.
This term, which I coined at the end of 2024, turns out to resonate with a lot of people who do what you and I do for a living: sell and/or lead sales teams. I think one of the reasons that this word has hit such a nerve in so many different organizations is that we’ve all had direct experience with this distinctive, paralyzing insecurity. It kicks in at the very moment we’re getting ready to sit down and compose a customized email, or reach out to someone on LinkedIn, or pick up the phone, or do anything else that closes the gap between “total stranger” and “someone I talk to.” We’ve all been there.
THE VOICE IN OUR HEAD
Our fear of prospecting—our irrational hesitation to pick up the phone, talk to a stranger, or initiate a conversation—is the voice in our head that whispers, “What if they reject me?” or “I’ll do it later, when I feel more prepared.”
Do either of those internal messages sound even vaguely familiar? Have you ever used some variation on either one to justify, empower, and reinforce your own prospectophobia? For instance: “Actually, [filling out my expense report] is probably more important right now.” (That’s “What if they reject me,” translated into the dialect known as Busy Work.) Or: “You know, I usually get my best work done under pressure, so it’s actually smarter for to do this at a different time.” (That’s “I’ll do it later, when I feel more prepared,” translated into the dialect of Camouflaged Avoidance.)
At this point, I must ask you a life-changing question, a question I pose to my clients during training and coaching sessions. What’s scarier: hearing “no” from a prospect … or repeating the seemingly endless cycle of watching your pipeline dry up, so it’s impossible for you to make ends meet?
Our all-too-human instinct to avoid addressing and answering that critical question is yet another symptom of Prospectophobia.
YES, THIS IS REAL
Make no mistake. Prospectophobia is real—and it’s ruthless. It’s the silent killer of achievement and prosperity: the fear of rejection, judgment, and failure. It’s the reason we “research” well beyond the point of preparation instead of picking up the phone and calling someone, or asking a current customer for an introduction to someone we know they know. Prospectophobia is the reason we talk about everything but the pain we and your organization know how to make disappear when we eventually do find ourselves in a discussion with a prospective buyer. Prospectophobia is what keeps us super busy, but constantly broke.
Here's a point of view to consider. What if the pain you’re avoiding is the pain you’re choosing?
An intense, irrational fear of prospecting will not kill you. Avoiding dealing with that fear will, however, kill your career, your business, or possibly both. When you avoid dealing with or understanding the root causes of that fear, you are choosing to live in it.
So my challenge to you is a simple one: Choose your pain.
Will you choose the pain of addressing the symptoms, understanding what lies at the root of those symptoms (hint: it’s some form of head trash) and getting the cure, so you can move on to the next phase of your life?
Or... will you choose the pain of further, ever-deepening, chronic Prospectophobia?
Which pain will you choose today?
Are you scared of getting caught off guard on your next call? Are you worried about getting rejected, about not knowing how to respond to an objection, about making a fool of yourself? Are those really the right pains for you to spend your energy, your attention, and your precious time avoiding?
Or is there maybe, just maybe, a more immediate, more relevant, more significant pain on your horizon for you to consider? Something that has a more lasting impact on your lifestyle, your well-being, your ability to contribute, and your relationships with the people who matter most to you than a fifteen-second conversation with someone whose name you may not even remember a week from now? Something like, say, the collapse of your pipeline?
A REALITY CHECK
Many of the salespeople we work with decide, after getting some deeper perspective, that it’s time for a reality check. They decide that Prospectophobia is not only real, but that it’s crippling their growth – not just their income growth, but their personal growth as a human being. They just never had it diagnosed properly before.
Once they hear and understand the diagnosis, they get personally invested in addressing, and resolving, the root causes of the unique, personalized mental and psychological factors that are holding them back. And once they’re invested, they make a series of fateful choices: the choice to take action; the choice to choose habits over motivation; the choice to choose systems over goals.
After they’ve committed to those choices, positive change happens. And here’s the good news: it tends to happen pretty fast.
If any of this is ringing a bell for you... if you’re ready to make a new series of choices... if you’re ready to choose a different pain than the one you’re presently choosing... maybe we should talk.
