Even though they may not be clearly defined, you likely have some long term objectives for yourself, your family, your career, your business, etc. Recently I heard some advice about being insincere that bothered me greatly and has since I heard it.
I was visiting with a potential client and was saddened to learn of a bad experience they had with a consultant who provides some services similar to ours. This individual was hired to do some sales training for a group of individuals who are responsible for business and client development. One of the main lessons this individual taught the audience was that you should always be complimentary of your prospect – even if it is insincere.
When I heard this I was shocked, appalled, and even a little speechless. In sales one of the most important aspects is clearly the Bonding and Building of Rapport you have (or need to have) with your prospects and your clients. This is important for three key reasons:
- People who are like one another, tend to like one another.
- People who like one another, tend to trust one another.
- People tend to do business with people they trust. In all relationships, business and personal, everyone wants to be heard and understood.
How in the world could insincerity be part of this equation?
Most people sense insincerity and when they do – it does not build trust! It does not help you Bond, and it does not help with the Building of Rapport. In fact it does the exact opposite – it causes question and makes people NOT want to do business with you.
Would you want to do business with someone who you feel is being insincere to you?
As I am sure you can tell – learning this bothered me GREATLY. Not only because teaching someone to be insincere is counterproductive to the core fundamentals of building relationships, but also because it paints a terrible image for individuals and organizations that do what we do.
The conversation where I learned this was with a potential client; this person could and did need our services. However because of the bad experience they had with this other organization, they now have a negative image of what a consultant does. We spent our time together visiting and trying to undo damage done, rather than positively moving them to a better place where their business could grow.
Please do not be insincere – nobody likes it. Others can and will see through it. People buy from people they like; People like people who are like themselves; Thus – people buy from people who are like themselves. The key to Bonding and Building Rapport – is being like them. If they are insincere with you, do you truly want to do business with them?
Crandall is the Principal of Sandler in Oklahoma City, Oklahoma. He works with business owners and motivated individuals to create and implement Professional Development Strategies to foster the growth of individuals, teams, and organizations.
