In sales, most of the pain we feel doesn’t come from what’s happening right now—it comes from what we imagine might happen tomorrow. We borrow stress from the future. We project rejection, lost deals, and awkward conversations into our day before they even occur. The result? We’re miserable in advance. And this is a disaster. Seneca once wrote "It's ruinous for the soul to be anxious about the future and miserable in advance of misery, engulfed by an anxiety that the things it desires might remain its own until the very end. For such a soul will never be at rest-by longing for things to come it will lose the ability to enjoy the present things."
The truth is: the call hasn’t happened yet, the buyer hasn’t objected yet, the decision hasn’t been made yet. But our minds fill in the blanks with worst-case scenarios. That internal dialogue--the radio station in your head--creates hesitation, fear, and often sabotages the very outcomes we’re hoping to avoid.
What channel do you listen to when you're worrying? Do you ever turn it off? As Mark Twain once wrote, "I've suffered a great many catastrophes in my life. Most of them never happened." If your radio station is an announcer who pundits doom and catastrophe--how do you check yourself?
If you don't, consider it!
Why Anticipatory Stress Hurts Sales Performance
It drains energy before the action. Worrying about how a conversation might go eats up focus and confidence you need in the moment.
It distorts perspective. When you assume the worst, you interpret neutral signals as negative ones.
It leads to inaction. Fear of rejection makes you delay calls, soften your messaging, or over-explain instead of asking real questions.
And what do you think? How does anticipatory stress hurt your performance?
Action Steps: Break the Cycle of Borrowed Stress
Name the Fear, Then Park It.
Before a call, write down the worst-case scenario you’re imagining. Acknowledge it, and set it aside. This separates imagination from reality. Think of it this way: if you're a pessimist and a worrier, you're half-way to being an optimist. You've already mastered the worst-case scenario. Now what does the best-case look like?Anchor in Intentional Behavior.
Instead of thinking, “What if they shut me down?” ask, “What do I want to learn from this conversation?” Focus on one clear, controllable objective. When you walk into a meeting with a plan for what you want to accomplish in the Clear Future Commitment (CFC) stage. You will more likely land a CFC.Stay Present with Process.
Follow your sales system step by step. A structured process keeps you from spiraling into “what ifs” and redirects you to “what’s next.” Sometimes processes fail. Sometimes winging it works. But, a process helps you stop thinking about yourself, and spend your energy reading the room.Reframe Stress as Practice.
Every tough call isn’t a judgment of your value—it’s rehearsal. Even rejection provides insight you can use on the next conversation. If you're repeatedly experiencing tough calls--it might be that you need to rehearse more. Remember, Repetition is the Mother of Learning.
Final Thought
Sales will always carry uncertainty. But uncertainty doesn’t have to mean misery. By refusing to borrow tomorrow’s stress, you give yourself freedom to show up with clarity, curiosity, and confidence today.
Don’t be miserable in advance. Be intentional in the moment. That’s how you shorten cycles, build real trust, and create outcomes worth showing up for.
