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Words, Commitment & Follow Through

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The content of this recording is copyrighted by Sandler Systems, LLC. All rights reserved.

Transcript

Glenn Mattson
Welcome back to another provoking episode of building blocks of success, season three, Episode 10. I'm your host, Glenn Mattson. Today we're going to be diving really deep into the art of making better commitments to ourselves and to others. Get ready to unlock the keys to achieving remarkable success in both your personal and your professional life. So let's start this journey together. 

Glenn Mattson
Imagine if you woke up every morning with a renewed sense of purpose and commitment, not doubt, not negative feelings. You follow through on the promises to yourself and to others forging stronger relationships and achieving your goals. Which in turn creates unwavering determination. I mean, how does that sound? Right? Isn't that something we would all love that we understand what we're doing, why we're doing it, we keep promises of the activities that we have to do. We drive execution and we accomplish it. You realize that in studies, many people will tell you the most challenging things they had to do in any fiscal year, the most challenging things they had to do, were historically the things that in their mind, were the greatest growth for them. And the things that they were the most proud of. 

Glenn Mattson
See, most of us aren't necessarily super proud on easy stuff. We're more proud on the things that take grit, take time, take our commitment, are hard, and we still win. So let's begin by acknowledging the impact. Really, the impact of our level of commitment has on our lives and the world around us. 

Glenn Mattson
Did you know that according to a study by the American Psychology Association, the lack of commitment is the number one cause of unfulfilled potential, broken dreams and missed opportunities? Lack of commitment. It's time to reverse this trend and I want to make a conscious of how to make commitments to yourself and to others. Look, self-talk is everything team. You've heard me say this before, but do you realize that self-talk, the things that you say to yourself, actually dictate 99% of every decision you make? 99% of the decisions you make are based on an internal script that you have in your head. Regardless if you hear it, regardless if it plays and you can acknowledge it, it's there. And it controls pretty much everything that you do. So one of the things I want to take a look at right and that self-talk is, man it pops up when you have obstacles. It pops up when you have roadblocks. It pops up when you're successful, when you make challenges. Man, I talked to one person this morning, and we were talking about how we had a staff person, and he goes she is the best thing since sliced bread. I can't believe she's with me. This has been the best year and a half with me, but she called in today and she's no longer gonna be working here because she's moving. And then he says underneath his breath. That always happens to me once I get close, it always takes it away. 

Glenn Mattson
So when you're knocked down, your challenges, or even if you have a success? You got an A in a test, what do you say to yourself? Oh, good. Now I can take a breather. What happens when you make a huge sale? What do you say, oh, I get the next three months off. My neighbor, a really good friend of mine, just hit his quota. And he hit his quota for the year which means that everything that he sells moving forward is four times his commission, four times the commission. And way back in April, when he told me he hit it, the other buddy I'm hanging out with right, there's three of us. And he turns around and says, Well, that's fantastic. Sounds like you can coast for the rest of the year. I turned to him and said, if you coast, I will beat you with a toolbar, I mean, there's no way that you can coast, it's four times the revenue, it's four times your commissions. You got to put your gas down and do everything humanly possible to get as much business in this year as you can. Which he has done. We did the cookbook with him, I sat down, we did his behavioral plan. He's closed more business in the last six months, five months, immensely. So he's earned, by far, this is almost three times his best year ever. I told him when it happened, if you do this right, this can be a life changing year. 

Glenn Mattson
So we have to make the right choices. We have to make the right things in our head to make sure that we hold to commitments. So during this week, in preparation for this podcast, I wrote down just on a little piece of paper sitting on the side of my desk, little post it note, how many times I heard I will try, I hope to, should be able to. Drives me crazy when people use those words. So let's take a look at this journey for a second.

Glenn Mattson
The first step is to understand that languages that we use when making commitments, actually, for instance, it's going to give you insights on what's holding you back right so, I should be able to do this, often implies self-doubt and uncertainty. You got to make sure that you replace it with empowering expressions like I am capable of, or I will achieve not I should be able to. I should be able to. Those words bleed lack of commitment. I should be able to. You've got to change that to I am, I'm capable, I will do it for you. I will have it done by Here's another one. How about this phrase? Drives me nuts as a second one. I'll give it a try. I'll try. How it may seem kind of innocent because you're using the right word, try and I will, it opens the door for really a ton of excuses and people not taking responsibility. So instead of saying things like, I will try, I want you to say I am, or I will. Take out the word try. I will take this decisive action; I will accomplish this by tomorrow. I will give this to you by the end of the day. Not, I will try to give it to you by the end of today. 

Glenn Mattson
So I'm trying to share with you successful people, honestly many of them even get irritated when other people talk to them like that. Not I will try; I will should. Another one that drives me nuts this week. I wrote them all down, I've tracked how many times I hear them. It's just disheartening. This is why I want to share with you the podcast this week. Right? How about the seductive phrase of hey, look, I hope so. It's beautiful to have hope, it really is. It's nice to have hope. But I'm not really sure what hope has to do with commitments. Don't rely on hope. Without action hope doesn't do anything. Hope is like throwing someone out in the middle of a river with in a boat with no paddle. Just ridiculous. So I hope to, I got to reframe that in your brain to I am determined to; I will actively pursue; you've got to combine your hope with action. So if you're saying I hope to, no, convert your hope and connect it to action. That way we can actually have a path to achievement. 

Glenn Mattson
Now before I get into the whole bunch of those three, which you know I'm going to rant in a second on that. I want to discuss the impact of our commitment in terms of language that it has on others. When someone says I should or right, I should be able to or let me think about it, we inadvertently signal hesitation and lack of commitment to other people. So, let's suppose I turned around and said, hey, do you want to go to and I said, you know what? I'm gonna give it a shot. Let me see if I can try to get there. Well, that's not someone who wants to do it. So we got to make sure you understand that when you will use the words I should, when you use the words I will try, when you use the words I hope to. Please just gotta get rid of them. You have to.

Glenn Mattson
I actually had two individuals as clients this week. We had a meeting on Monday. We had a recap on Wednesday because of something that was happening on Friday. So of the two individuals, David and Sam, Dave is an external and Sam's more of an internal and they work hand in hand. Dave's a sales guy, Sam's an internal sales guy that does a lot of service work. So David, on Monday, said, we need to do these three things. David said no problem. I will do number one, I will have a two tomorrow morning by 8am. Sam says, okay, I will try to do the other two by the time we have our meeting on Wednesday. So I say to Sam, Sam, I appreciate that. What do you mean, you're going to try? So then Sam literally drops down to well, listen, I understand it's important, obviously, I'm gonna give it my best shot. I'm hoping to get to it tomorrow, but we do have a pretty full day and our meeting is on Wednesday morning. 

Glenn Mattson
So again, I say, Sam, listen I appreciate that. I get it short time period. Sure. You got a lot of work to do. I'm hearing you. But what I'm trying to figure out is, are you going to have it done by Wednesday or no? And that's when he literally says I should. And that's when David spoke up and said, Sam, this is a yes or no answer. That's the only two words. Will you have it done by Wednesday? Sam couldn't answer David's question, he kept skirting it. Which is part of the issue David has with Sam. Lack of commitment, I want you to hear it in your friends, I want to you hear it in the people you work with, I want you to hear it in your clients, in your prospects, want to hear it everywhere. If I turn to a staff member and say, Hey, I'm going to need some help on A, B and C, can we get that done by the end of the day? I'm not looking for I'll try. Because if it's where I'll try, I'm gonna go to somebody else. I need it done. I'm not asking if you can try to do it. I'm asking, can we get it done? And how do we get it done? Right. So gotta make sure your words are right on target. 

Glenn Mattson
So really want to make sure that from where you sit, that it does take energy and effort, it does take your mind to think about what you're saying before you say it. And you really do have to have the mindset around stop using I will try I hope to and I should be able to. So we've all been there. So I just gave you one example about Dave and Sam. I'm sure you all have other examples. Hell, I have a buddy of mine. We started a gym the other day and I said alright, I'm going in at 7am, will I meet you there? And he literally said, yep, if all goes well, I'll be there right next to you. All I said is what do you mean if all goes well? What's gonna happen your car's gonna blow up at six o'clock in the morning? He started laughing. Again he wouldn't make the commitment. Amazing. 

Glenn Mattson
Now let's dive into some practical steps that we can do to make better commitments. But I really want to make sure you got to understand the first thing is you need to be aware of the language that you use. You must be aware of it. You got to listen for it or tell your friends if I ever say this word you got to stop me and mid-sentence. And by the way, these words always come up when it's time for commitments. If you say them. So first is you got to have the awareness that you're doing. Second is if you're not sure if you're doing it, get a friend, just like you should talk to some of your friends about utterances. Do I say like a lot? Do I say, um, you know. You gotta have some people around you that are gonna help you deal with some stuff that maybe you're not even hearing. Whoever that may be, I should, I try, I think I can, think of should, all those, change them. Replace them with empowering phrases. And I had to tell you, the empowering phrases are historically, I will with a date and an action. I'll get that to you by tomorrow afternoon. I'll get that to you by the end of today. That's going to be a big lift, I will get it done. Is it okay if I get it to you tomorrow morning? If I get you tomorrow morning, it's not going to be okay? So you want to timestamp your actions and your dates. But I would like it to be I will, I will, I will, I will.

Glenn Mattson
I also want you to take a look at from where you sit, to hold yourselves a little more accountable. You establish specific goals, you create action plans, and then you monitor your own progress. So setting up milestones can help you achieve this. Making sure that we have benchmarks and little success areas, right, so you never tried to eat the elephant one whole bite. So holding yourself accountable is not for some people it's journaling is really important and helpful. But you got to hold yourself accountable by the commitments that you make. So if someone's going to ask you to do something before you say yes, and some people just say yes, just to have to stop talking or say yes, because that's autopilot. But you really got to think about what you're saying. You got to ask yourself, am I gonna get this done or not? And if the answer is yes, then hold yourself accountable. And if you didn't do it, own it, don't say why. Own it, and then get it done. No one wants to know why you didn't get stuff done. It's called excuses. 

Glenn Mattson
Here's some accountability. How about stop your snooze button. You can do that one, that's pretty easy. Supposed to get up at six o'clock. That's a commitment. You have to get up when your alarm goes off. It hits; pop out of bed, what the hell you're hitting the snooze button for? We've talked about what happens when you hit the snooze button. It is so bad in many different areas, especially honestly, physiology, you go back to bed for seven minutes, your body needs 65 minutes, it just it makes you get crazy. So no snoozing, right. If you make a commitment to go someplace or to do something with somebody, stick to it. 

Glenn Mattson
Now what's going to happen is this, when you start holding yourself accountable, you're going to be less likely. It's a matter of fact, it starts to irritate you less likely, of excuses from others. It's kind of like a truck backing up, you don't even hear them until you stop doing it yourself. When you stop doing yourself you're gonna hear everybody making excuses. It's insane. So you got to make sure you're accountable. Make sure that you use the right words from where you are. Stop saying yes to everything is another good tip. Be very specific on what you say yes to. 

Glenn Mattson
So as we conclude this episode, I want to really leave you with some mindset that your mind actually dictates, right, your script, your mind, will dictate a lot of your commitments, and it comes out in your words. So your heart may say, yeah, I'm committed to that. But the word you use will say things like, yeah, listen, everything goes well. There's really no reason we shouldn't get that done. Hey, listen, I'm hoping to get that done by the end of today. Yep, absolutely. I should have that to you sooner than later. I should have the capacity to do that, I think. Yeah, no problems. You can go on and on and on. So you got to find out what you say. Be aware of it, change it. Find someone that you can have as a sounding board or an accountability partner. But also, when you do say yes to things start saying yes to last but whatever you say yes to 100% make sure you get it done. 100%, because people are going to start to understand as you get in the work world, as you start getting deeper into the work world, you start doing more and more sales with better people outside your natural market. All that fun stuff happens dramatically when we start holding ourselves accountable. 

Glenn Mattson
Take a moment, reflect on the phrases that you use and how they impact your level of commitment. Remember, your language has the power to shape your reality and to inspire those around you. Thanks for joining me on this episode of the Building Blocks of Success. I hope you gained some valuable insights into the art of making better commitments to yourself and to others and unleashing your true potential. Now go on out there and choose your words wisely. Next time, stay committed, stay inspired, keep building those blocks for success. Talk to you soon.

Glenn Mattson
This is the Building Blocks of Success with Glenn Mattson.